Yom Kippur, our annual Day of Atonement, ended two weeks ago. Always in the past, I focused on seeking forgiveness from others. This year I decided to seek forgiveness from myself.
This involves a variety of steps:
– Reflecting on my actions
– Being accountable for any harm done to myself by myself — instead of just uttering, “Oh, well!” and leaving it at that
– Working actively on self-improvement
By emphasizing the above intentions, I hope to make great strides towards spiritual renewal in the new Jewish year of 5786.
Time will tell.
I get very discouraged when I am too busy. It’s not stemming from a fear of falling behind, but it is a feeling that I need to utilize every second of my waking time to accomplish what needs to be done. That is exhausting.
AND, I don’t take into account regard for actual deadlines. This is an energy zapper. I’m shifting focus.
My new mantra:
I AM GRATEFUL THAT I HAVE
SUCH A FULL AND INVIGORATING LIFE.
I WILL PRIORITIZE MY TO-DO LIST.
I’m going to review my ever-burgeoning to-do list.
I am going to pick four top-priority items that beg immediate attention.
I am going to do them and save the rest for another day.
When another techy challenge pops-up — like my paying Uber twice for the same ride — I will pivot from previous self-destructive behavior. I will not throw a tirade. I will not yell out loud, “Why does this always happens to me??!!”
Instead, I will investigate how to fix it.
I will write down the solution so the next time it happens (and it WILL), I will know how to constructively deal with it.
I will recognize that learning new things is hard, but staying stagnant and stuck in old ways is not an option.
I will recognize that ingesting mouse bites of knowledge leads to sustained progress over time.
I will master using a Cricut machine.
I will learn how to expertly braid the dough of unbaked challah. And I will search until I find a recipe that yields buttery challah, not dry and tasteless challah. (BTW, I’m open to any suggestions.)
I will learn Canva.
I will look into what a sublimation printer is.
Just not all at once.
Just not all in the same day.
I am letting go of the destructive mindset that I didn’t get enough knowledge and know-how packed into the day.
I will concentrate on progress made.
How?
By writing a journal entry at the close of each day documenting exactly what I have learned in the prior 24 hours.
Yom Kippur was both a profound and solemn day, culminating in a lovely meal to break the food fast of the last 24 hours. I was in the company of two of my five sons, two of my three daughters-in-law and five of my eight grandchildren.
And what was the most salient fact I learned?
That some days it’s more beneficial to just bask in the goodness of life and save mastering new endeavors for the following day.
It was a good start to a productive AND kind-to-myself New Year.
May we all be inscribed in the Book of Life for another year.
May we all continue to Preserve Our Blooms,
Iris Ruth Pastor
