Leah phones her husband at work, “Issy, do you have time for a chat?”
“Sorry, Darling, this is not a good time — I’m about to go into a board meeting.”
“But this won’t take long,” Leah says. “I just want to tell you some good news and some bad news.”
“I really haven’t the time,” says Issy, “so just quickly tell me the good news.”
“Oh, all right then. The air bag on your new Lexus works very well.”
Morris works in a local care home looking after the elderly. He’s very good at his job. For example, during the admission procedures he always asks new arrivals if they’re allergic to anything and if they are, he prints it on an allergy band, which he places on their wrist.
One day, he asks a new arrival, “OK, Becky, I have just one more thing to ask you. Are you allergic to anything?”
“Yes I am,” replies Becky. “I’m allergic to bananas.”
Later that morning, Becky’s son comes storming angrily into the office and shouts, “OK, who’s responsible for labeling my mother ‘bananas’?”
From Oy Vey: More! The Ultimate Book Of Jewish Jokes Part 2, by David Minkoff