Howard had been a good Jew all his life. Now, ninety years old, he was very ill and in the hospital. As the rabbi walked up to the bed, Howard’s condition began to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on. When the rabbi gave him a pencil and a piece of paper, Howard used his last ounce of energy to write a short note. Then he died. The rabbi placed the note in his jacket pocket and said prayers. Later, at Howard’s funeral, as the rabbi was finishing the eulogy, he suddenly remember the note.
“I’ve just remembered,” said the rabbi to those present, “that Howard handed me a note just before he died. I haven’t looked at it yet, but knowing Howard, I’m sure there’s a word of comfort in it for all of us.”
The rabbi opened the note and read, “Help, you’re standing on my oxygen tube!”
From Oy! The Ultimate Book of Jewish Jokes, by David Minkoff