Bernard, an elderly Jew, is bumped by a car while crossing the street. He is seemingly unhurt, but Sarah, his wife, persuades him to go to the doctor, just in case.
Bernard returns home, and Sarah says, “So? What did the doctor say?”
“The doctor says I have a flucky.”
“Oy Gevalt! A flucky! Terrible. What do you do for a flucky?”
“I don’t know — he didn’t say and I forgot to ask.”
Well, by this time Sarah is in a state of high anxiety. She tells her neighbors, “My Bernard was hit by a car, and now he has a flucky. I don’t know what to do.”
Neighbor One says, “In the old country, when someone had a flucky, we always applied cold. Cold is the best thing for a flucky.”
Neighbor Two says, “What are you talking bout? Cold is absolutely the worst thing you could do for a flucky. We always applied heat, that’s the only thing to do for a flucky.”
Cold, heat! Oy! Now thoroughly agitated, Sarah decides to call the doctor herself.
“Doctor, please tell me, what’s wrong with my husband?”
“I told him — nothing’s wrong. He got off lucky.”
From Oy! The Ultimate Book of Jewish Jokes, by David Minkoff