Bible characters dating profiles

Compiled by Shimmel Flecker 

Assistant Editor

Vashti

Just got out of an emotionally abusive relationship. Sick of narcissistic men. Looking for a stable man — preferably not of noble birth — who doesn’t mind a strong woman! 

I’m something of a feminist. I hate arrogance, gawking, and old boys clubs. 

Favorite Hobby: Fighting the patriarchy!

Esther

I’m a simple, down-to-earth girl. I grew up without parents, so I long for a huge family. I want 12, maybe 13 kids at least. 

I won a few beauty pageants when I was younger and was voted most loyal in Hebrew Day school. 

Favorite Movie: Cinderella

Mordechai

A retired man seeking a companion. I never had children but love ‘em: I raised my niece and volunteer at my Shul’s Sunday school. I own several corgis and love to garden. 

Favorite Book: The Count of Monte Cristo

Miriam

An aspiring singer-songwriter who is always davening and always at Shul. Can be opinionated—just ask my brothers! 

I love dry walks near the sea

Favorite Charity: National Eczema Society

Samson

Day trader and gym bro. I don’t take disrespect from anyone, and I wake up each morning ready to crush the competition. 

Looking for a good time — nothing serious! Let’s have fun!

(Check out my hair…)

Favorite Quote: “Either you’re with me or against me.”

Boaz

A workaholic farmer who just never settled down. You can find me at the local food bank or humane society giving back to the community. 

Looking for a younger woman who wants children. Hopefully she is Jewish but willing to change for the right woman— don’t tell my mother!

Favorite Alcoholic Beverage: Red wine. (I’m classy, what can I say?)

Ezekiel

A little bit eccentric. I love making model cities and baking sourdough. I despise inauthenticity. 

I’m a tortured artist type. A few of my art installations—“Shaved Head” (Ezek 5) and “Packed Bags” (Ezek 12)—have been featured at the local museum. 

Favorite Beatnik: Allen Ginsberg

Cain

Living a nomadic lifestyle: I backpacked through the middle east for a few years and have lived in my van for the past 6 months. 

I tried sustainable farming for a bit but am looking into a career change.

I’m estranged from my family—its complicated. Looking to start a family of my own.

Favorite Song: “Runnin’ With the Devil” by Van Halen